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    Wednesday Wisdom: "Pic" Up a Stone

    Wednesday Wisdom:

    Cape House | Home & Hospitality Boutique | Amelia Island, FL March has become a significant month for me. Four years ago, our daughter was born (March 24). Two years ago (February 26-March 5), we were in Cape Town, South Africa, where the concept for Cape House was inspired. A year ago (March 2), I stepped out in faith to pursue this new business venture full time. And this past Saturday (March 3), we enjoyed being a part of a photo shoot with Jess Henderson for Cape House. A photo shoot may not seem that significant, but as I scrolled through the pictures, I realized how much my little girl has already grown up! With a few tears streaming down my face (shocker, right?), I thought about our visits to the NICU for 18 days after she was born and her petite, 4lb 1oz frame. Now, she's embracing adventures with T-Rex dinosaurs and riding roller coasters at Sea World (even if it is in Shamu's Happy Harbour). One of our associates in the store said, "I would give anything to go back and have pictures like that with my kids at that age." Pictures are priceless, and they capture moments that we will look back on for years, even generations, to remember where we were, who we were with, and what we were able to experience. Moments matter! I try to remind my wife that as I reach for my phone every 10 minutes to take another picture or video. Yes, it's often cheese or bacon, but there's a lot of Addi Grace and snapshots from my day. She still doesn't believe it needs to make it to my Insta story, but we'll continue to wrestle through that. Every single picture means something though. Think about it, when you scroll through your social media feeds or look back at an old photo album (yes, you used to have to print pictures and put them in a book), it heightens your sense of an experience. If we're not careful, we'll get preoccupied with what is right in front of us without even seeing it. In Joshua 4, God has led his people through a river, literally. He stopped the river from flowing to allow them to walk through on dry land. Miraculous. A moment. God instructs Joshua to select twelve men from each tribe and pick up stones from the middle of the river and set them down on the other side as a sign of what God did for generations to come. I love this. It's simple AND significant. Take something from the middle of what you experienced and bring it to the other side. I don't want to dilute an incredible miracle God performed, but at its core, this is a "picture" of capturing the moment and memorializing it. We may not always perceive our daily grind as equivalent to walking through water, but I promise there are moments in the midst of it all (that God is in) and He wants you to remember it. He wants you to use it to share His faithfulness and His goodness for others to see. In the current pace of technology, I encourage you to "pic" up a rock from what you're walking through. Take in the moments God is putting in front of you and capture them because what you experience ultimately tells His story. THESE STONES ARE TO BE A MEMORIAL TO THE PEOPLE OF ISRAEL FOREVER. JOSHUA 4:7 Cape House | Home & Hospitality Boutique | Amelia Island, FL Cape House | Home & Hospitality Boutique | Amelia Island, FL | Photographer: Jess Henderson Photo | View More: http://jesshendersonphoto.pass.us/capehouselifestyle Cape House | Home & Hospitality Boutique | Amelia Island, FL | Photographer: Jess Henderson Photo | View More: http://jesshendersonphoto.pass.us/capehouselifestyle

    Wednesday Wisdom: Your Mask First

    Wednesday Wisdom: Your Mask First

    Cape House | Home & Hospitality Boutique | Amelia Island, FL There are 2 types of people in this world, the ones (like me!) that no matter if it's your first or 100th flight, you pay attention to the safety demonstration as you prepare for take off, taking mental note all of the exits. And then there are the ones (like my husband) that don’t! No matter what camp you fall into, surely you have heard these words: In the event of a decompression, an oxygen mask will automatically appear in front of you. To start the flow of oxygen, pull the mask towards you. Place it firmly over your nose and mouth, secure the elastic band behind your head, and breathe normally. Although the bag does not inflate, oxygen is flowing to the mask. If you are traveling with a child or someone who requires assistance, secure your mask first, and then assist the other person. Have you ever really thought about what they are saying? Shouldn’t I put the mask on my child first? Isn’t this a little selfish? In this new and current season of my life, I am learning how to manage our new normal in a healthy way: a child entering real school with real friends and real extracurricular activities; a new, baby business that’s learning to crawl (you know the season where its growing and developing and you are so proud but you can’t take your eyes off of it quite yet); another business that's learning to drive - it’s scary to let it grow up. To be honest, some days feel like mayday with 3 children and no flight attendant in sight. My natural instinct is to give away my mask first, no matter the cost. And in the middle of all this, the word discipleship keeps ringing loudly in every conversation, every sermon, and every moment of solitude. Discipleship - this is why we exist. In the words of our pastor, "Be one, make one." Overall, this reoccurring theme has made me feel inadequate, like I’m not doing enough - not pouring into the people around me and the next generation like I should. But this week, God really started to break this down for me in a way that makes sense (so thankful for his patience, can I get an amen?). Our office is walking through Flourish: Live Free, Live Loved by Margaret Feinberg (if you haven't read it, you need to! Get a copy here, and learn more about Margaret here.) I have to share what I read this morning:

    As an introvert, my friend Tara feels a lava lamp of emotions trapped inside her whenever stuck in a crowd or a one-on-one conversation with a stranger. "I don’t really like people. As terrible as it sounds, it’s true," she confesses. "I would do anything for my close knit group of friends, but for the most part, others tend to interrupt my well-organized plans for the day. That annoys me." Several months ago, Tara woke up early to spend time in her quiet backyard. This space has become a respite of solitude for her, a place where she can breathe deep and recharge. She nested with a coffee, Bible, and a grown-up coloring book filled with scripture. She inhaled a deep breath. Thank you, Lord, for blessing me with this opportunity to have my quiet time surrounded by creation, she prayed. No sooner had she said “amen”, then her neighbor appeared outside. Please, don’t let her talk to me, please don’t let her talk to me. Tara tried not to look in her neighbor’s direction but she could feel her moving closer. The neighbor reached Tara’s yard, greeted her, and showed Tara the fancy garden hose she’d purchased from QVC. The neighbor began recounting all its features, the most unique being its ability to expand. When the hose was not being used, the entire coil was no bigger than a cantaloupe. “...but watch this,” The neighbor said, hooking it up and turned on the water. The hose grew two more than 50 feet, allowing her to reach new areas of her lawn without effort. Within moments of turning off the water, the hose return to its original size. When the neighbor departed, Tara rolled her eyes. Then God stepped in. “I sensed the Holy Spirit say, ‘this is a picture of what you are like when you’re not loving others - all coiled up. If you let my love flow through you, look how far you can reach.’” What began as an interruption blossomed into a moment of freedom. Tara discovered the freedom tucked into Jesus‘ command to love your neighbor. When we open ourselves to water our world with love, God can use us in spectacular, stretching ways. Instead of offering stingy, conditional love, we become mirrors of the way Christ loves us, freeing us to love people without conditions, bounds, or judgment. Jesus teaches this principle when asked to handpick the greatest commandment. “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘love your neighbor as yourself’” (Mark 12:30-31) When Jesus speaks these words, he draws from deep within Leviticus, a book central to the Torah, which lists regulations for priests and laity. At first and even second glance, the hundreds of laws listed in Leviticus appear archaic, difficult to understand. Yet interwoven into these laws are the love-language of God. Leviticus is God’s declaration, “This is how you love me! This is how you walk in greater freedom!” We expect to find a command to love God here, but Jesus ties five sticks of dynamite around the command words when he adds: love your neighbor as yourself. Jesus knew that it would take psychologists many years to discover: the way we treat others reveals how much we love ourselves. The ruthless words we use with others never compares with the barbarous things we say to ourselves. Our interactions, attitudes, and conversations with our neighbors can expose what we really think about ourselves. Often we don’t love others well because we don’t love ourselves well. We run ourselves ragged, squirm with resentment, and soak in bitterness because life hasn’t turned out the way we hoped. If we refuse goodwill to others, we won’t extend it to ourselves. When God‘s love for you becomes God‘s love in you, then God’s love flows out of you. We must give ourselves permission to love ourselves well. A bubble bath. Our favorite meal. A massage. Extra foam on that latte. Spend time considering all the good gifts God has given you. You don’t have to be an introvert to find wisdom in Jesus' command. These words apply to us when we find ourselves coiled up, easily irritated, or stingy. Let the living water fill you up and spill out onto others.  - Margaret Feinberg, Flourish: Live Free, Live Loved
    Ahem…did this get you like it got me? What a concept! Put on the oxygen mask first! You cannot help, serve, and love others well if you don’t. You cannot pour from an empty cup. Such a simple - and let’s face it - obvious concept. God is not asking me to add one more thing to my to do list, He is asking me put on my oxygen mask - care for myself so He can use me to full potential - not to empty me. Discipleship is not another thing to add to our never-ending to do list; it's a natural overflow of God’s love in us. “You can’t pour from an empty cup, take care of yourself first” - Unknown Cape House | Home & Hospitality Boutique | Amelia Island, FL

    Wednesday Wisdom: Fierce Conversations

    Wednesday Wisdom: Fierce Conversations

    Cape House | Home & Hospitality Boutique | Amelia Island, FL I attended a training last week with a few other co-workers entitled Fierce Conversations. The main inspiration for this curriculum: "While no single conversation is guaranteed to change the trajectory of a career, a company, a relationship, or a life - any single conversation can." This is HUGE. Just think about the conversations in your life that may have changed your trajectory - like when your husband or wife proposed; or when you announced you were having a baby (or adopting one); or that one encouraging conversation you had with someone you love and respect that gave the nudge you needed to start a new venture or take that big leap of faith. The training was very enlightening but at the same time, very convicting. It reminded me of all the ideas and great intentions to focus on people and relationships and having the right conversations this year - and how I have already allowed myself to get caught up in life's craziness and forget this goal. It was a reminder that the only two things that last forever are God and people. Although we may think our jobs or lives are really complex and difficult, with an endless amount of "to do's", at the end of the day, it's all about relationships. God put us on this earth for people. No matter what your profession or calling is, it’s all about relationships. One of the key foundations in Fierce Conversations is that conversation IS the relationship. When the conversation stops, so does the relationship. The power of our words can bring either life or death into our relationships. The right words and the right conversations can - and will - change outcomes for better or for worse.

    Wise words satisfy like a good meal; the right words bring satisfaction. The tongue can bring death or life; those who love to talk will reap the consequences. Proverbs 18:20-21 (NLT) The soothing tongue is a tree of life, but a perverse tongue crushes the spirit. Proverbs 15:4 (NIV)
    Fierce is defined as "powerful or with heartfelt intensity." I would describe Addi Grace, our almost 4-year-old, as fierce (also, dinosaur-like!) Maybe we should all step back and take a few lessons from our kids in how to be fierce. When she wants something, she lets you know with intensity and there really is no questioning what she is trying to say. She does not beat around the bush or care about any elephants in the room. She is powerful and direct. She puts emotion into her conversations. She doesn’t give up when she wants something. She keeps asking. Now, sometimes, it involves growling or sounds like a broken record, like, “Mommy, mommy, mommy, excuse me, mommy, mommy, mommy, I have to tell you something,” all just to get my attention and tell me a made-up story... Nonetheless, it’s important to not just talk - but to have planned, intentional conversations with intensity - if we want to move forward in our goals and in our lives. A fierce conversation is defined as one "in which we come out from behind ourselves, into the conversation, and make it real." What's an indicator that you are having fierce conversations? If you are enriching a relationship. You should always leave a fierce conversation with a resolution and plan to move forward in a positive way. Everyone is better and stronger for it. You shouldn’t leave the same as when you came in. These are the kinds of conversations we need to be having more of.
    Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” Ephesians 4:29, NIV
    In fierce conversations, we are also encouraged to master the courage to interrogate reality. Great leaders seek the truth. You can’t have a fierce conversation without having a clear goal in mind and without being willing to ask the tough questions - and keep asking them - until you get some solutions. One of my co-attendees expressed the need for a reminder in the office to be brave. Thanks to the Bible and worship music, I had just the encouragement we needed and quickly put together a graphic for her office, also sending her the link to two songs to play on repeat: Oceans and You Make Me Brave!
    For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline. 2 Timothy 1:7 Be strong and of good courage, do not fear nor be afraid of them; for the LORD your God, He is the One who goes with you. He will not leave you nor forsake you. Deuteronomy 31:6 The LORD is my light and my salvation; Whom shall I fear? The LORD is the strength of my life; Of whom shall I be afraid? Psalm 27:1
    Lord, help us all to be brave. Give us the courage to ask questions and seek the truth in love. Encourage us to make time for people and to make sure we are having intentional, fierce conversations so we can all keep moving forward and running the race. Don’t allow Satan to clutter our minds with business and fear.
    Psalm 19:14 (ESV) “Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O LORD, my rock and my redeemer.”
    Cape House | Home & Hospitality Boutique | Amelia Island, FL Click here to learn more about Fierce Conversations.  

    Wednesday Wisdom: Love is in the Air

    Wednesday Wisdom: Love is in the Air

    WW_FB 2.14.18-01 Love is in the air! It’s everybody’s favorite manufactured holiday, so gentlemen, I hope you made preparations to woo your significant other on a holiday that was created just for that. This will be the 19th Valentine’s Day for me & Tiffany, and to this this day, my favorite V-Day story might be our first. We were 17 & 15 and in puppy love. We had been dating for about 6 weeks and I had made up my mind that our first Valentine’s Day would be when I broke out the "L" word for the first time. We had a "romantic" dinner, probably at Sonny’s BBQ (our go-to back in the day), and then went to drop her off at her house. Before I left, I gave her a card, small gift, and blubbered out my rehearsed spiel. I don’t remember what I all I said, but the grand finale was me saying "I love you" for the first time. I waited with baited breath for her response and her words were… "Aw, thanks." Not perfect. To this day, she’ll make up some excuse for not saying it back, but I’ll continue to hold it over her head, just because I can. But let me brag on Tiffany for a minute. She is full-time entrepreneur with two businesses, with a passion to serve others. She’ll admit that saying no is her weak spot, but despite all the pulls on her time, she prioritizes family first and is a fantastic mom to Hannah Grace and a wife to me.  She is a superhero in my eyes. With anything, she has days where she thinks she’s failing and other days where she feels like she can conquer the world, but day-in, day-out her ability juggle and manage all the different balls in the air amazes me. With that said, I also know her well enough to know she would much rather me take out the trash or clean out the garage than brag on her in a blog post. Since that first Valentine’s Day, I’ve learned a lot about relationships. At that time, neither of us could do wrong in the other's eye. That changed more quickly for her than it did me (yikes), but as we grew more comfortable with each other, the more I realized showing love is WORK. Not a little bit either. It takes being intentional every day. Lance and I were sitting around talking about how we could make our wives happier (no easy task), and we decided we would do one intentional thing each day to show our love in a way THEY would appreciate. We texted each other daily to remind the other and hold each other accountable. It lasted all of about 10 days. I tell you that to say, despite our best efforts, life gets in the way. Ephesians 5:28 says “husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.  After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church”. This serves as a great reminder because ultimately our Creator is the one who put love in our hearts. We love because He first loved us. And until we can get our arms around this, we’ll always treat our relationships as “quid pro quo”. I love you so you’ll love me back. But that’s not how love is defined in the bible. We should shower our spouse with deep love because Christ has done the same to us. So on this Valentine's Day, I encourage you to be intentional in how you show your love. Not just today, but everyday! Happy V-Day! Cape House | Home & Hospitality Boutique | Amelia Island, FL

    Wednesday Wisdom: In the Weeds

    Wednesday Wisdom: In the Weeds

    Cape House | Home & Hospitality Boutique | Amelia Island, FL Anyone who knows me knows that I have the opposite of a green thumb. There’s a little story my family and close friends like to tell to embarrass me that includes hydrangeas and limes...yes, I said limes! We will save that story for another day when y’all are bored and need a laugh at my expense. While sitting on my back porch this weekend, I noticed a weed poking through the deck boards that seemingly came out of nowhere. I got up to pull said weed and noticed the tiniest, yet spikiest thorns (ouch!) running from the top to bottom of the stalk. As I continued to look closer, this little weed - that appeared out of nowhere in a day's time - had grown down, around, and over one of our azalea bushes. I was shocked! This little vine (weed) that no one invited to my yard had slyly invaded and was taking down one of my most precious plants (you know... the ones that bloom beautifully in the spring without much maintenance at all). Who did this weed think he was, and how did I miss it?! It must have been there for weeks, silently invading my space. God spoke to me in that moment. You see, I hadn’t paid much attention to this azalea in weeks. I walk past it multiple times a day but it wasn’t in my routine to take care of it - or really even acknowledge it - until I realized it was compromised. And to be honest, I really only appreciate it when it’s in full bloom. It took a spikey vine through the deck boards of my porch to make me even think about it. How often am I like this with the things God has entrusted to me? John 10:10 tells us that the enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy. He is constantly looking for ways to slyly invade the good things and relationships God has given to us. In the very next breath, Jesus tells us in John 10:10 that HE came to give us a full and abundant life! What is important to us takes constant attention and appreciation and cultivation. The moment we begin to neglect these good things, we are giving the enemy an open opportunity to do his thing. Don’t get me wrong, the enemy doesn’t win here! When he does get a hold of what is valuable to us, by no means does it mean that it’s not salvageable; it just means that it’s going to take some extra TLC to get that thing or relationship back on track, so you can continue to move forward in the purpose God intended. This week, I encourage you to take inventory of the things and people in your life that may be like that poor azalea out back. Have you neglected them? Do you only appreciate them when they are in full bloom, when you need them -  when everything is going right? If so, grab your gloves, and pull the weeds. Make a plan to prioritize the daily investment it takes to ensure those weeds don’t creep back in. Cape House | Home & Hospitality Boutique | Amelia Island, FL