There are 2 types of people in this world, the ones (like me!) that no matter if it's your first or 100th flight, you pay attention to the safety demonstration as you prepare for take off, taking mental note all of the exits. And then there are the ones (like my husband) that don’t!
No matter what camp you fall into, surely you have heard these words:
In the event of a decompression, an oxygen mask will automatically appear in front of you. To start the flow of oxygen, pull the mask towards you. Place it firmly over your nose and mouth, secure the elastic band behind your head, and breathe normally. Although the bag does not inflate, oxygen is flowing to the mask. If you are traveling with a child or someone who requires assistance, secure your mask first, and then assist the other person.
Have you ever really thought about what they are saying? Shouldn’t I put the mask on my child first? Isn’t this a little selfish?
In this new and current season of my life, I am learning how to manage our new normal in a healthy way: a child entering real school with real friends and real extracurricular activities; a new, baby business that’s learning to crawl (you know the season where its growing and developing and you are so proud but you can’t take your eyes off of it quite yet); another business that's learning to drive - it’s scary to let it grow up.
To be honest, some days feel like mayday with 3 children and no flight attendant in sight. My natural instinct is to give away my mask first, no matter the cost. And in the middle of all this, the word discipleship keeps ringing loudly in every conversation, every sermon, and every moment of solitude. Discipleship - this is why we exist. In the words of our pastor, "Be one, make one." Overall, this reoccurring theme has made me feel inadequate, like I’m not doing enough - not pouring into the people around me and the next generation like I should. But this week, God really started to break this down for me in a way that makes sense (so thankful for his patience, can I get an amen?).
Our office is walking through Flourish: Live Free, Live Loved by Margaret Feinberg (if you haven't read it, you need to! Get a copy here, and learn more about Margaret here.) I have to share what I read this morning:
As an introvert, my friend Tara feels a lava lamp of emotions trapped inside her whenever stuck in a crowd or a one-on-one conversation with a stranger. "I don’t really like people. As terrible as it sounds, it’s true," she confesses. "I would do anything for my close knit group of friends, but for the most part, others tend to interrupt my well-organized plans for the day. That annoys me."
Several months ago, Tara woke up early to spend time in her quiet backyard. This space has become a respite of solitude for her, a place where she can breathe deep and recharge. She nested with a coffee, Bible, and a grown-up coloring book filled with scripture. She inhaled a deep breath.
Thank you, Lord, for blessing me with this opportunity to have my quiet time surrounded by creation, she prayed.
No sooner had she said “amen”, then her neighbor appeared outside.
Please, don’t let her talk to me, please don’t let her talk to me.
Tara tried not to look in her neighbor’s direction but she could feel her moving closer. The neighbor reached Tara’s yard, greeted her, and showed Tara the fancy garden hose she’d purchased from QVC.
The neighbor began recounting all its features, the most unique being its ability to expand. When the hose was not being used, the entire coil was no bigger than a cantaloupe.
“...but watch this,” The neighbor said, hooking it up and turned on the water. The hose grew two more than 50 feet, allowing her to reach new areas of her lawn without effort. Within moments of turning off the water, the hose return to its original size.
When the neighbor departed, Tara rolled her eyes. Then God stepped in.
“I sensed the Holy Spirit say, ‘this is a picture of what you are like when you’re not loving others - all coiled up. If you let my love flow through you, look how far you can reach.’”
What began as an interruption blossomed into a moment of freedom.
Tara discovered the freedom tucked into Jesus‘ command to love your neighbor. When we open ourselves to water our world with love, God can use us in spectacular, stretching ways. Instead of offering stingy, conditional love, we become mirrors of the way Christ loves us, freeing us to love people without conditions, bounds, or judgment.
Jesus teaches this principle when asked to handpick the greatest commandment.
“‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘love your neighbor as yourself’” (Mark 12:30-31)
When Jesus speaks these words, he draws from deep within Leviticus, a book central to the Torah, which lists regulations for priests and laity. At first and even second glance, the hundreds of laws listed in Leviticus appear archaic, difficult to understand. Yet interwoven into these laws are the love-language of God.
Leviticus is God’s declaration, “This is how you love me! This is how you walk in greater freedom!”
We expect to find a command to love God here, but Jesus ties five sticks of dynamite around the command words when he adds: love your neighbor as yourself.
Jesus knew that it would take psychologists many years to discover: the way we treat others reveals how much we love ourselves. The ruthless words we use with others never compares with the barbarous things we say to ourselves. Our interactions, attitudes, and conversations with our neighbors can expose what we really think about ourselves.
Often we don’t love others well because we don’t love ourselves well. We run ourselves ragged, squirm with resentment, and soak in bitterness because life hasn’t turned out the way we hoped. If we refuse goodwill to others, we won’t extend it to ourselves.
When God‘s love for you becomes God‘s love in you, then God’s love flows out of you.
We must give ourselves permission to love ourselves well. A bubble bath. Our favorite meal. A massage. Extra foam on that latte. Spend time considering all the good gifts God has given you.
You don’t have to be an introvert to find wisdom in Jesus' command. These words apply to us when we find ourselves coiled up, easily irritated, or stingy.
Let the living water fill you up and spill out onto others.
 - Margaret Feinberg, Flourish: Live Free, Live Loved
Ahem…did this get you like it got me? What a concept! Put on the oxygen mask first! You cannot help, serve, and love others well if you don’t.
You cannot pour from an empty cup. Such a simple - and let’s face it - obvious concept. God is not asking me to add one more thing to my to do list, He is asking me put on my oxygen mask - care for myself so He can use me to full potential - not to empty me.
Discipleship is not another thing to add to our never-ending to do list; it's a natural overflow of God’s love in us.
“You can’t pour from an empty cup, take care of yourself first”
- Unknown
A little over a year ago, March 27, 2017, we were staring at an empty building with mounds of dirt - dirt that had to be relocated in order to pour the foundation (and there was a lot of dirt!) While we had a vision of what the store would become we were a long way from “seeing” it.
I was listening to a podcast (Masters of Scale) earlier this week featuring the founders of AirBNB, and I was reminded again of the process involved with starting something new. If you are unfamiliar with AirBNB, the company operates an online marketplace and hospitality service for people to lease or rent short-term lodging. The founders, Brian Chesky and Joe Gebbia, started with their loft in San Francisco, offering up three inflatable mattresses and a home cooked breakfast for $80. Ten years later the company is worth $31 billion, the second most valuable startup in the world behind Uber. Don’t get me wrong, I am not comparing Cape House to AirBNB, but they had plenty of dirt to move too!
A year and a half into their operation AirBNB was only averaging 50 people per day on the website and 10-20 bookings. So they got creative. They went door to door (literally) of their hosts and found the answers that allowed them to improve the user experience and eventually scale to a global brand.
They had a saying, “do everything by hand until it was painful.” We haven’t adopted that saying but we have had our fair share of pain. Moving dirt was painful, but it was the beginning of the process.
There will always be dirt in the way of your dreams. Are you willing to pick up the shovel and start the work?
While watching the girls play and build towers with legos one night, Hannah Grace - not so gracefully - reminded Addi she needed to build a better foundation for her tower or it would continue to fall.
Addi acknowledged what Hannah Grace said but continued building and rebuilding her tower the same way! She didn’t really change her ways or heed HG's advice.
I watched Addi keep adding blocks to her tower trying to make it taller and taller, keeping it sturdy with one hand while building with the other. Sure enough, it continued to tumble. She was determined to make this work, her way, and proceeded with persistence.
God so gently reminded me of two important lessons in that moment.
First, was the obvious… The wise man builds his house upon a rock …sing along! (You can thank me for that being stuck in your head later...)
Ever feel stuck? Like you have been waiting forever for something? Not sure whether you’ve missed a turn or are on the right course? Constantly questioning where you are and what you should be doing differently? The middle zone! Anybody?! Or is it just 
March has become a significant month for me. Four years ago, our 
